I have a confession to make, I consider myself a fairly intelligent, well-adjusted woman, sister to all sisters, but I am sickened by the protests of women lately. I was always, and always will be, an advocate of women and the inequalities that exist, as well as the horrific way women globally are treated in other countries, but I have to be honest, I never felt that I was ever entitled to a damn thing because I have tits. Seriously, growing up I was a true tomboy and I had to earn the respect of the boys in my hood so I could play ball with them, hang with them, and be one of the guys! That meant I didn’t complain when they pitched the ball at 80 mph, and it whizzed by me in a blur, I didn’t complain when I was goalie in street hockey and I lifted my face mask for a minute and said time out, and one of the boys slammed the puck into my eye, and left me looking like a deranged raccoon for two weeks. No I sucked it up, held back my tears, called him an asshole, and some other unsavory names that don’t bear repeating and got back out there and kicked ass!
When did women go from burning bras which was a powerful statement by the way, to walking around donning vagina costumes, which is a ridiculous statement by the way! I lose all respect for anyone doing that, seriously stop doing that you look insane, and you’re not only frightening small children, you’re scaring the hell out of me. Women fought for equal pay, equal rights, and to be taken seriously, and with the exception of the right to choose, I feel women have come a long way baby! Women are making strides albeit slow, but we as women have shattered the glass ceiling, and in less than 20 years since I was in the corporate world, I have seen the roles of women in business grow exponentially. Women still receive less pay in some areas, but women also have more opportunities and are running companies that just 20 years ago wouldn’t even be a consideration. Where did this sense of entitlement come from? I don’t feel underappreciated, or devalued as a woman, because I never allowed myself to feel that way. I think many woman are raised with the values of very specific gender roles, and what they are capable of, or destined to be, because they are a woman, and I was never raised that way. Nor am I raising my daughter that way. My mother never once said to me because you are a woman, you will marry, raise a family, and be a stay-at-home Mom. Which ironically is exactly what I did for 17 years. She wanted me to go to college, pursue a career in medicine and be self-sufficient. She never discouraged me from playing in the dirt, being a tomboy, playing sports, or any thing for that matter. She let me be me, and never put limits on my abilities because I was a girl, and because of her, I grew up to know my worth as a woman, but more importantly as an intelligent equal, participant of the human experience. Now that doesn’t mean I never experienced sexism, sexual harassment in the work place, or received a lower salary than my male counterparts, I sure as fuck did, but I worked harder, stuck up for myself when I needed to, and in the end if I wasn’t treated fairly, I left that employer and found one better suited for me, and one who was fair and decent to all employees men and women. Don’t misunderstand what I am saying, I love being a woman and wouldn’t want to be a man for one second! I love men holding the door for me, admiring my hair, or a hot new outfit, and I am now a girly girl, but I also like being able to bring something to the table in terms of the fact that I can hang with the guys, appreciate the raunchy banter and not be offended, talk sports and actually know what I’m talking about, I can freely admit the flaws in women, point the obvious ones out in men, yet enlighten men as to how wrong they are about what women want in bed, at home, and in a mate.
This International Day Without Women Strike isn’t a noble gesture, it’s self-serving and does more to discredit women and their accomplishments, than draw attention to some legitimate issues. I for one don’t want President Trump to overturn Roe V. Wade, it’s an outrage to me as a woman to have anyone tell another person what they should and shouldn’t do with their bodies, and I’m sorry unless you provided the sperm, you do not have a right to have a say in what I or any other woman, does for herself and her fetus. It’s not your fight, you’re not part of that plan, and I am pretty sure God didn’t elect you advocate of the uterus.
A day without women implies that for 364 days out of the year we are walking around shroud in complicity, of service to men, nameless, faceless warriors, doing battle to right the wrongs of the evil masses of men, who disregard us as low-class citizens, and nothing could be further from the truth in my eyes. Men revere women, they pursue them, respect women, who respect themselves, want to care for and protect them, and yes sometimes bad men do bad things and hurt women, and sometimes bad women do bad things and hurt men. I am so perplexed by this backlash of women crying inequality, when it has never been a better time in history to be a woman, this also includes minority women, who are recognizing freedom to be who they are and taking leadership roles in the workplace, and government office. We still have a way to go, but I believe that women are bridging the gender gap and are contributing to the next generation of women who will reap the rewards of the pioneers before them.
Nothing does more to undermine the integrity of a cause then to assert blame and make yourself to be a victim. We are not victims, this is a self-serving, egotistical view, that lives in the heart of insecure, ill adjusted women, with a distorted view of themselves and the sense of entitlement that by mere virtue of being a woman, they should expect certain concessions. While I will be the first to say that if I can perform the same job as a man, then I too should get the same salary, I will also say I am not blind to the fact that as badass as I think I am, the majority of men will be stronger than I, will excel in certain careers because of their physical stature, making them more qualified to perform certain tasks than I. Not many, I assure you, but by the same token I have the privilege of being able to create and sustain life, and give birth, and as of today, no man is able to top that!
I know that some women reading this blog will be pissed at me, they will believe I am anti-woman, which could not be further from the truth. I just want women to see that we are so much more than what our protests have spawned. We are sending the message to the younger generation that we are victims, that the plight of women rests on the shoulders of egotistical men who are keeping us down. I agree that in some countries women are still viewed that way, but here in America we are not, and we are empowered because we are able to get an education, are free to pursue any career we choose, and to live a life authentic to who we are, not in spite of the fact that we are women, but because we are women! So with this I say, seek your truth, know your worth, and stop feeling entitled. If you never accept that you are less than, you will never have to fight to prove you aren’t. As the great Helen Reddy said in her 70’s song, “I am Woman Hear Me Roar!”